With our two stars, The Eye and The Closer, unable to attend our Round 2 playoff match, The Greatest and Best Team in the World looked to the only person with enough passion and dedication to fill both of their shoes: Barack Obama. Since he had intended to repay the "favor" I did for him a few years back by offering me a high-level federal appointment, Barack was initially reluctant to take on the challenge. Of course, this reluctance was immediately replaced with sparkling vigor and an insatiable thirst for victory after we introduced our patented, all-natural, delicious energy beverage. He was also pleased to know that the championship team is awarded donations for the charity organization of their choice.
With Barack providing that extra competitive edge along with several "Try to hit the Palin-a" puns, The Beast, Jennufine, and The Captain cruised to consecutive 16-10 victories over two worthy opponents, #7 Boccelism and #42 Invasion of the Bocce Snatchers. It turns out you can put lipstick on two losing bocce teams but they're still two losing bocce teams. Nobody knows what that means. When Barack says something, you just laugh and try not to make too much eye contact.
On to the Elite Eight!
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